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Mon, Nov. 22nd, 2004, 08:07 pm
(we never did let her know what was beyond those beady eyes of hers. as she swept away in a life that she thought was the life to live. her family and the treeswing outback where the mist of the sky planned out what her future was. the morning of her mothers death at a sudden shock drove her to hope religion would save her. the cross behind her every step of her choices in the castle that WAS the world. the isolation never seemed to bother her, well because she didnt know any different. the strinking pose of death left her in the danglement of what was life?....
she never saw beyond the horizon of the sheltered closet that she dwelled in. living everyday only off her breath and the suffocation of her mind. over and over she watched her mother drop at supper time. she never knew such a thing existed. still waiting for her mommy to get her from the closet she locked herself in. the morning after the next, she trots out looking for her mother. into the kitchen she walked. 1 man hanging, 2 children dangling like coffee pots from the ceiling......)
(she swings the closet door open) 15 years of knowing nothing. her eyes paralyzed. that icy blue smile. terror to the truth. unfolding the shoe box, gripping life at its neck. red paint suited the rooms colors anyways....
Sat, Nov. 20th, 2004, 02:27 pm
Fri, Nov. 19th, 2004, 12:02 am
Fri, Nov. 12th, 2004, 11:50 pm
my new band
http://www.purevolume.com/thecowboyconspiracyme, lee, michelle the best 20 minute session ever expect a hardcore EP out soon. all about the western frontier and all the WHAWHAHWAWHAW you better be hittin' that shit up. also look for blessedbe and starlightmoon if you are in the mood for a little more talent. we are all excited, bring the mosh pit! we are so fucking EMO p.s. THIS IS MY FUCKING ART, ILL HAVE NEW PAINTINGS UP VERY SOOOONN!!! leave a comment http://oceansunsets.deviantart.com/ Tue, Nov. 9th, 2004, 04:37 pm
Tue, Nov. 2nd, 2004, 09:21 pm
I am the face of death.....
fuck beautiful bridges
1 cheer to goodtimes, and one for all
crumbling to the sea
she shouted it all in my ear like a whisper
goodbye beautiful bridges...
[scene opens on friends driveway]
squating, bawling into his hands in the middle of his friends driveway, he turns around to see where the screaming is coming from. the potent smell of death, he turns around again to see his hands filled with blood. in hysteria, he turns around again to see the flames and the continuous screaming. from the garage ceiling, three men lay frozen hanging from the hooks in the garage door.
Him: what is this?! what have i done?!
the blood pouring from his hands, he runs frantically from the house... Sun, Oct. 31st, 2004, 09:33 pm
the bridges are burning
our faces together is the face of death
beautiful meadows in the sunsets
i am what i could have been
black sharpie marker to my neck
mark X for the puncture
the sea is drowning
your legs in the mist, like the ghost that never was
city walks, noise for my face
the comeback of the photo's
the sky is cloudy
my starry night, where are you?
the sea sank
the bridges gone...
we are the face of death... Thu, Oct. 28th, 2004, 06:17 pm
...running away from the drifting sun i hope it never catches me the knifes(love) in her heart, the past that created my imaginery friend i was led by a little girl, black hair with those gorgeous dark eyes. i didnt let go the haunting glisten of the moon upon her face never letting that smile break off her face, perfection upon the floor my starry night, my wonder of life. the savior, to where the last shot wasnt close enough for me to be satistified ghouls, trying to take back what they once lost. scars like a on-coming disaster sunrise: its always the darkest before the light arises. only the worst is to become of this all those conceited smiles, just as dark as the night, just as beautiful as the day my lost treasures, my lost devils. forgotten sunsets, too many night for a frenzy to remember sun: i hope you still hold tight...i will never let go morning: we were undeveloped film. i was still cold as my eyes froze over, her hand on fire. i was still dreaming of how much time i had left in her hand. 9 more hours till sunset.....
Mon, Oct. 25th, 2004, 09:45 pm
for humans recreate, reproduce, destroy, give birth to our ideas, make mental images physical images, but we have a limited time to give impact to the history of life and the human race. why does God live forever, when he did just as we do now, he created the world (this will all be from a christian view). the death of god is only a reality, he may be the embodied spirit that was the ruler amongst the heavens and hell. for he created a culture, a world...the perfect system..
if mother gives birth to child=mother give birth to child=mother give birth to child, than
x gives birth to God=y give birth to God=z....?
what is x? where is it?...everything has a birth and a death, where is his birth?
with the growing power of socialogical explanations, scientific approaches, and the development of a stronger structure of philosophy, we have outdued religion as the security blanket people have known it as. as in the 1500, there was no such thing as atheism (because if you were, you were probably killed) and now in the new millenium we obviously have a growing rate of "x-mas" celebrators who have no faith, but are white, north american and initially adopt the christian religion, only to be labelled as one not practicing faith. I, going to a catholic school have developed a much stronger structure of opinion in reality vs. lala land which most people accept as a way of dealing with fear. as mentioned before, who is God? i can almost portray him as a the father figure in the heavens, which he has commercially become.
if we have faith in everything, than we could no nothing, but count on faith to teach us and let us know everything. if you have faith in something unkown, then you could live in a room alone and have faith that you are the only one alive on this planet. its all a mental process that runs through your concious mind and then redevelops unconciously so that you think you have expierence a "miracle of God" or "my faith has led me", but really what you have been taught about religion just did a relapse and you just applied it to modern life in a situation of fluke, or accident.
the bible was used to control and subdue people during the 4th century and constatine used the church as a tool for government. what happened to the 300 year gap?
we have no beginning, because the beginning is x. x - develpoment - life - **end??**
that variable is so powerful, that people have figure out how to write books to make any type of answer to it, and people have come to believe it; then again billions have. with christianity being the 2nd largest religion in the world, what will come to? a religious government?
when will the black and white images cease and when will reality be put in place?
extientialism, agnostic, atheism, etc...true ideas developed and known to be the belief of multiple philosohpers who have impacted our society.
jesus christ, our savior, the son of god.... so son? x - god=mother - jesus?
wheres jesus's mom? since mary is a virgin...
give me answers to all this.
the death of God began a long time ago, he was once the succession of the human race and the power that "developed" us. he cant live forever, he created what he was, a humanical figure or gesture
the birth and the death....God is dead...... Sun, Oct. 24th, 2004, 10:42 pm
"Condemed, because he did not create himself, yet is nevertheless at liberty, and from the moment that he is thrown into this world he is responsible for everything he does." -sartre make him responsible for the worlds terror, trouble, war, sickness.....you are our god, right? then help us...... ...maybe at this point his fury has reigned, and he has passed on and fallen before his feet and we are, once again, looking for his help in the empty black sky that he never did reign, that black empty sky that halo's or sick world...
Sat, Oct. 23rd, 2004, 10:54 am
Sat, Oct. 23rd, 2004, 10:48 am
converge is god, it was the most amazing thing i have seen in a long time. we got their at about 430 and we waited there for a very long time. at about 545, there were over 70 people waiting who didnt have a ticket, as far as i recall i was the only person who got in on an extra ticket from someone else (im so glad i asked every single person in line haha) but i left melissa and lee outside which i felt like shit about at the time, but i found out they snuck in later anyways right before converge started. by the time 9 oclock came around i was completely dead and they were only like half way through their set. i got some wicked pictures.
cave in sucks
between the buried and me can sure pack a punch in such a short set.
i will never forget that night
pictures soon... Sun, Oct. 17th, 2004, 11:42 am
if your going converge on friday at the bottom lounge in chicago, you think you might have an extra ticket (or 2 or 3)? ill pay double or more
DESPERATE AS FUCK! Thu, Sep. 30th, 2004, 06:57 pm
in the last weeks of his life, ted, a highschool senior, drew fantasy cartoons and recorded his thoughts in a written code that only a close friend could decipher. part of teds coded obituruary written shortly before he killed himself read, "my IQ is 142. my mind is diseased, that i know. i am going to kill myself what a relief it was. i am so much better now, you cannot do wrong when you are dead. time is infinite, you are at the beginning..."
Tue, Sep. 28th, 2004, 04:27 pm
http://members.home.nl/saen/Special/zoeken.htmla religious opinion for you all...( i was afraid to say anything in class today, i thought she would kill me) why is God such a powerful figure in society and religion if now, since God created man and so forth, wouldnt he be relevant in their lives since the beginning, cave men? only in the past 4000 years god has been represented in our society, so why didnt we know about him before? and why is it that we treat the greek gods and stupid myths, but at that time, greek people believed in them as much as christians do in Jesus and God. So what is the truth here? if God did create man, why wasnt her around till recently? there were so many polytheist communities and societies for thousands of years before them. in all, the idea of man created god is a stronger and more sturdy theory than God created man. where was he for those oh say, other 20,000+ years?
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saimesegun's journal
ack!
#2 puts me in this mood
i lost it